• Queer Pleasure

BMS Party Marty Dildo Review


Has the COVID-19 pandemic and associated lifestyle changes left you feeling nostalgic for the good ‘ole days? Do you miss the chaos and lighthearted glitz of pre-pandemic parties? Do you wish more than anything you could have some drinks and share a dance with your friends? Well, me too but I live in America and the time in which we can safely return to our silly, frvielous festivities is far from here so I’ve settled for a stiff vodka soda and a confetti dildo: throw on your preferred party music and it’s really not as different as you might think.

Now, I’ve gotten a bit too excited thinking about socializing but what we’re really here to discuss is a dildo that’s nearly as fun: the BMS Party Marty Confetti Dildo! Let’s get into the nitty gritty or rather, glittery and colorful!


Specs:

  • 7.5 inches total length

  • 5.5 inches insertable length

  • 1.6 inches max diameter

  • 100% silicone, body-safe, and waterproof

  • Semi-realistic, single density silicone (about 10A firmness or similar to an erect penis)

  • Harnessable base with a suction cup

  • $33.95 at The Vibed (use code QUEER15 for 15% off sitewide)

  • Included bullet (upgrade it to a Blush Nocturnal Bullet IMO: the included one isn’t great)


Design:

The BMS Party Marty is shaped like apenis: not the most detailed one but it definitely looks like a dick (well, if you can imagine a dick being translucent and filled with confetti). The coronal ridge juts out slightly from the shaft of the cock with a little bit of bunched foreskin below, providing subtle g-spot or p-spot stimulation in the medium-soft silicone. The shaft features some subtle vein details: no texture overload but a little extra something to make Marty feel more lifelike than if he had a fully smooth shaft.

The silicone Marty's made of is about a 9 or 10A shore: the single density fimrness closest to that of an erect penis (I would say more specifically, a grower rather than a shower). A dual or triple density silicone would be more realistic with the stiffer interior and squishier “skin exterior” but those dildos can be pricier and aren’t everyone’s cup of tea. For a single density toy, Marty does a damn good job.

Marty’s suction cup is fine; not the best I’ve ever used but will suction to flat surfaces. Just don't expect it to stay perfectly in place during a marathon dildo-riding session . The softish silicone means that this suction cup base COULD fold up in larger o-rings. That being said, it hasn’t given me any issues during strap-on play (my go-to harnesses have a 1.5 inch diameter o-ring). The balls on Marty are nice if you want the added realism but do take away from the potential insertable length: I was every so slightly dismayed that this dildo couldn't reach my a-spot, but alas, Marty is better suited for g-spot stimulation and general hole-filling.

Marty in the grass

Party In Your Pants or Party Pooper?

Marty is stunning and stands out among the collection of dildos I’ve ammased as a sex toy critic. It looks similar to the original Luzarte Jollet which I love, however, these two are very different toys in use. The Jollet started the trend of translucent silicone toys with tidbits of brightly colored puff balls suspended inside. Marty looks different enough from the OG Jollet that I’m not actively angry about copying: it feels--to me--like BMS took some inspiration from the Jollet rather than straight copying it, but I’m certainly open to hearing other points of view on the subject.

In terms of whether or not it’s amazing sensation-wise, Marty does exactly what it's meant to: fills you up decently but not overbearingly and is good for a solid, lifelike fucking. It's good for only about $30. Marty feels like a penis of a size that could occur in nature. This is no giant penis and for lots of people, that’s a good thing!


Ideal Uses & Bottom Line:

Marty is great for folx looking for something realistic in shape with a fun design. Nothing crazy, but it’s also priced very fairly for a pretty, 100% silicone dildo. I wouldn't reccomend this dildo if:

  • You want something really big or something really small

  • You only like hyper-realism in your insertable toys

  • you like really hard or really squishy toys

Otherwise, it’ll probably do a good job fulfilling it’s intended purpose.

Marty is a great, budget-friendly option that’s more aesthetically pleasing than many realistically shaped dildos. Click here to check out Marty at one of my favorite online retailers.


The BMS Party Marty Dildo was sent to me by the wonderful people at The Vibed in exchange for my honest review. As per usual, all my opinions and statements are 100% my own. If you’d like to send me a product for review, go to the Work With Me page to get in touch.

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I'm A. (she/they), a clueless queer and blogger. I started this blog because I grew up in a small town where sex--especially queer sex--wasn't talked about. I was a determined youngster and managed to scrape the bottom of the internet barrel to find the information I needed (and later, the information I wanted). Now that I've learned a bit about queer pleasure in all of its forms, I wanted to create the resource I wish I'd had; a place where I could read about someone else's experiences and learn about sex from a pleasure-centered perspective. If you have a question about something or want me to cover a certain topic, just shoot me an email! Chances are, I've been there and would love to help or at least offer some moral support, and who knows, maybe others could benefit from a post about it. 

 

Stay safe, be gay, and abolish the police, 

A.

Welcome!

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